Light or Darkness, Yes or No, Black or White, Inner Peace or Outer Chaos.
I have had to counsel several friends on changing certain habits or behaviors. At that moment, you’ll get a sense of remorse, calmness, and peace in them. One that can be likened to the sunset. Next is some form of ginger – they become so enthusiastic and acquire enough energy that they feel they can jump mountains. That they can make this change. Sometimes I join them to celebrate, but sadly this energy, drive, and ginger is short-lived.
There are many decisions we have made but we never see them through. Most can last for a week, some a little over a day and before we know it, we are back to business usual. I am far from perfect and I am a culprit to some very relatable decisions such as going to a gym (which lasted for a week) and reducing soda intake (which I am doing a better job at but I sometimes still cheat on non-cheat days). There are many decisions we have taken but we have failed to stick to. So, just so you know we are in this together, some are: stop eating junk food, drinking, smoking, procrastinating, lying, late nights and we have also made some decision to progress like reading books (Bible, Courses), remain humble, resume early, etc. I’m sure some can now relate.
I will never say I have a perfect solution to a problem but I am very certain it is better than never trying. Once, I made a decision to stop a habit that I am very grateful I did. Let me take you on a journey.
There was a blog I got myself intertwined with. I read every piece of information daily and you cannot say trash about the blog (I was a fan and supporter). I’m sure you’re thinking, “What’s bad about reading a blog?” Well, there is a saying that “There is nothing sweeter than bad news”, and yes the blog was full of exposé gist or negative news like; cheaters, public fighting, hidden camera gists, jealousy, and some good news. I found out I was exposed to this news and I was good at giving the latest bad news or never being the last to know it but when an economy’s gist comes I would not be able to contribute. To make matters worse, I started acting up to either prevent and defend things based on this information. I became the bearer of bad news because I believed it was sweeter than good news. (What you see and feed on the most is what you will eventually become).
I admitted to who I had become and decided not to be that person anymore. (Telling yourself the truth and admitting it is one step to making that overdue difference).
So I made a decision to stop reading the blog and not get involved in conversations around it. Truth be told the process was not easy but I made a decision after telling myself the truth and – most importantly – sticking to it. So I constantly reminded myself about who I wanted and who I did not want to be; it is as simple as saying you want to be rich and not poor but you keep saying it in your mind. I was doing mental gymnastics to see what I wanted to become. All I needed was my MIND to accept the new decision. If my mind can be convinced (which to me is the most gullible being), show him an image constantly, he will become a slave to that image and then you find your body moving towards that direction to achieving it.
I remember my nephew at a young age was always sucking his thumb. We had done everything to make him stop severally but he just couldn’t. Yes, he had puppy-eyed us and promised to stop, and even when he tried, he could not. One day, I googled pictures of bad effects of sucking and I presented the extreme cases to him. He felt so terrible (yet horrified) and does not like being at the receiving end of jokes. So, he cried a bit, I pet him and told him I believed he had the capacity to stop. Guess what? He did. I am certain that any time he was going to suck his thumb, he remembered the pictures he saw, so he was motivated properly to stop.
Convince and motivate your mind and you are 50% successful.
In order to help my mind and the urge, I had to look for a replacement for the blog, so I had to read dailies and google news updates but restricted to the information that helped my cause. Eventually, I got so interested in government news and policies and it helped me predict some things to come. I got reading some Christian blogs with amazing topics as well as my Bible.
You have to replace a hole made with a perfect fit unless you have the cutout piece.
After a long process of withdrawing from the gossip blog, I triggered a move to convince my mind so my body will move in the direction I plan on going and then replacing the habit with a better one. I never went back to it. The most amazing thing was I generally became less interested in irrelevant news, and more in tune with good news.
A lot of people will say, “Well, your problem is not as big as mine”, and that this process cannot help them but I will leave this with you: that the same sling and small stones David practiced with when protecting his sheep from lion and bear was what he used against a big giant named Goliath.